dreamer's dreamland:D

2011-11-20T06:31:00.000-08:00

I have to find a new balance to our friendship.

and stop getting emotionally disturbed with every little matter that goes wrong. It's tiring, especially when I have to keep chiong-ing report for the next two weeks.

ps: MST is in two weeks time.

Hope I will be posting again when all this ends. chionggg-ah!

2011-10-07T08:18:00.000-07:00

No one would understand the level of stress I am dealing with right now.

Sometimes, something happens would make you come to realize that what was important ain't that important anymore.

keep smiling :)

2011-08-14T17:43:00.001-07:00

BADUMP BADUMP!

Interview Role Play Later!

ciao ppl!

2011-08-11T05:23:00.001-07:00

I am uneasy. so uneasy that I don't sleep well at night.

Exam's coming again, oh yes, it's that period again.

ITs the time when you have to juggle between assignments, projects, lessons which are due all at the same time. And then you have to study for exam.HOW THE HECK CAN I FOCUS WTF IS ALL THESE WORK LOAD. AND THEY ARE STILL PEOPLE WHO WON'T COOPERATE. RUINED MY PLAN.

even if it's always happening at the end of every semester and I actually have gotten pretty much used to this awful situation. but then I still can complain right, especially this is my blog.

Kay, enough talk. I am fine now. Let's get your butt up and work!

2011-06-29T23:49:00.000-07:00

Here I am!

posting to keep myself reminded.

Totally ruined the paper today.

kay, it means i just have to do better for the next one.

The least I could do is to stay strong

2011-06-07T03:25:00.001-07:00

If things don't go right,

well, we will just go left.

2011-05-29T07:28:00.000-07:00

I don't have an interesting life.

Come to think of it, what I do everyday is just school, manga, tumblr, projects, assignments.

and probably movie few times a month.yeah, these are what i was doing since the new school term starts.and yes i am sort of addicted to manga, again. like when I was 16.I hope it wont do any harm on my studies:( Mom kept calling, asking me to go for an overseas trip with her and my aunt.

well, where to? I don't seem to have time either. not during this last year of poly when I have two huge projects floating around, pulling my legs, made me ran around, read and keep reading, type till the clock strikes 12. That sounds a bit harsh eh. It ain't that bad, not when you get the contented feeling when you accomplish one of the task :)

ah, there's an English formal letter writting test tomorrow!

2011-05-17T00:07:00.001-07:00

I THINK I REALLY DO LIKE READING LECTURE NOTES.

after weeks of research, and failure, and frustration, i think it's the best to read lecture notes, do tutorial, which is all planned for you.

ciao people, going to stop working on research and get some serious reading!

2011-05-10T09:16:00.000-07:00

-thoughts of the day-

Mass Transfer B experiment was somehow boring without the old fun. It just feel as if I am forcing myself to do it, which is really painful. I prefer things to remain the same way they did, but things are beyond my control. Frustrated that I couldn't do anything. I don't have a stand to fix things since I am playing the game as well. Shocking new discoveries of people around you. Let's face it, they didn't become nastier, situation just got tense, and people have to survive. Much like the survival rule in the jungle?-kill or get killed. ha, I don't think I am being exaggerative. I am not offended by them either, it's not as if I am a kind-hearted person who got deceived by all the bad people and need any sympathy. It's just that I feel a bit depressing that the people I could hang around with without any uneasiness has pathetically reduce to a few people.

The professor from Scotland

2011-04-28T06:34:00.000-07:00

Met with the Professor from Scotland today. It's a good thing he doesn't have strong accent and we were able to understand him, well, most of the time?aha.

I find it very motivating when the professor said: I feel sorry for people out there who are not studying chemical engineering, there might be some other good course, but chemical engineering is just great , you will find a lot of opportunities in it.

that's really motivating :) !

2011-04-23T08:34:00.000-07:00

IT'S LONG WEEKEND THIS WEEK.
It's a shame to say though, I have done nothing significant.
not studying, not having fun, not hanging out too.
just stay at home, keep scrolling the facebook page up and down, then tumblr, then facebook, tumblr, facebook. and sleep.
that's how my life is since friday.
I feel bad, not doing anything :(.
and my laptop is dying real soon.
everything's just so slow.

and the weather! it's driving me crazy, I hate APRIL man ! it's always so warm !

2011-04-18T04:29:00.000-07:00

It' somewhat awful when you don't know who to complain to.

he has his reasons, she has her reasons, if i were to say anything, things would just turn out very bad.

But i have my reasons too, I can't pretend that I am happy when I am not, forever.

It's so tough.

I wanna go cycling! so much!

2011-04-16T07:54:00.000-07:00

Dear diary,

I think something is wrong with me. I meet a lot of people, and at first everything seems to be going okay, but then I start feeling like such an outsider.

sincerely,

dreamer.

2011-04-13T06:50:00.001-07:00

yay! final day of shift work! kinda dissapointed that we didn't manage to light up the furnace when it tripped :( ! it's actually fun to go out to the field and walk under the rain. ahahaha. everything is fun at first,of course, but it wont be fun anymore if you have to go out for like 6 times and stand under the rain like a total idiot, waiting for instructions. What's worse is you got scolding when you thought you could finally rest! anyways, that's not important, I have come to realise that conflict happens everywhere. life could be unfair to you, but it's always your choice on how to treat life. I have decided not to care :) but no matter what, the final test, which I wasn't really thinking of putting effort-I changed my mind. because I want to prove to certain trainer that SP3 is way better than his group. and oh please, talk less, you sounded like a total bitch.

2011-04-08T17:56:00.000-07:00

What's up with the poly schedule!!!

I missed the trip to Hong Kong last year and I am going to miss the trip to Beijing.

Great! Everyone else is going except me.

AHHHHHHH BEIJING!!

2011-03-24T08:02:00.000-07:00

Too much struggle with myself this week. heard too much. seen too much.

don't wanna talk about it, otherwise I would sound like a whining bitch.

Still, one thing that I feel great after all these struggling I have been through-

I am still breathing.

Maybe I should start thinking what I really want.

2011-03-22T07:00:00.000-07:00

I WAS JUST SOOOO CLOSE.

PDD SUCKS BIG TIME.

2011-03-18T08:25:00.001-07:00

I haven't been sick for so long and yet, 2 weeks of CPTC training can really wear me out.
I am coughing like mad now, damn.
*feel like my lungs gonna come flying out any time soon*

2011-03-11T05:27:00.000-08:00

I climbed up to 4th floors of the distillation today!( 4 and a half)

It was scary when I looked down, I can't let go of the handle.

The support don't stay still, they vibrate whenever people step on them.

My heart was beating as if I could hear it.

It was scary yet thrilling, just like when you are riding a roller coaster.

The difference is that you only feel the intense excitement when the roller coaster ride high up then come down again.

But I feel the sharp sensation for the whole time I was on the platform. ( for free too! :D)

The view was nice. Air was cooling.

Everything becomes so clear and the view can extend further for a few miles.

I was having so much fun with myself today. hahaha.

so who cares about those little mean bastard that piss me off.

2011-03-07T05:33:00.000-08:00

happily marched into CPTC today, wearing sandals.
Then, people there told us we must wear covered shoes from tomorrow's onwards.
I HAVE NONE. the last pair that I bought, the red colour converse was stolen.
(still feel like cursing the asshole who took it whenever I remember my shoes *heart broken*)
had been dragging for so long since I lost the last pair.
No more dragging.
i rushed to jurong point to buy one, yep rushing but not simply buying alright.
This is it.:D. it looks nice, really! if it doesn't appear nice, it's just because of my lousy phone.

ps: have a strong urge to dye my hair red.
opinion anyone?

2011-03-06T06:46:00.000-08:00

there goes the 70 dollars,

sent my wallet for colour and washing.

It's gonna be my first day at Chemical Process Training Centre tomorrow.

Well, it's not excitement I am feeling now, nor it is anxiety.

It's just like..hmmm

feel somehow like going into jail.

there's alot of procedure, hard work, people I don't know.

alright, I am not trying to be pessimistic here, well, I really feel like that.

bye bye holidays and heyyyyy jurong island.

2011-03-03T08:58:00.000-08:00

JB one day trip with mz, dw, ivan and qw.

Watched the adjustment bureau.

alright. movie was not bad. it's about how a man got in love with the girl, then fight hard to get her. yeah, love story. and guess what?

This guy that appeared in the movie,

and

this guy that played observer in FRINGE.

don't they look just the same? They dress a-like,

and their job is kinda same too- make sure things go according to plan.

well, such coincident?

I bought 2 pairs of grey colour contact lenses. photo would be revealed soon :D.

ps: wanted a hair cut, still thinking whether I should keep my fringe this way or cut it shorter. I always have headache whenever it comes to making decision!

2011-02-28T04:26:00.000-08:00

I know you guys are planning something behind my back.
and that you guys don't wanna include me.

I know I can spend hours wondering why and get all agitated,
but I would rather spend that time eating ice cream and have fun all by myself.

so you guys have fun too okay.
oh, and this:

2011-02-27T17:28:00.000-08:00

oh no!!!!!!!!!!!

fluid mechanics A exam later !

*scary*

2011-02-23T21:52:00.000-08:00

唉,活了19年还搞不清楚谁才是应该好好对待的人.
呵呵,是因为我对大家都太好了吗.哈哈哈

<吐>

2011-02-21T03:05:00.000-08:00

I am so not keeping up my image.
Tied up all my hair, pin up the fringe, wearing the black-frame glasses.
yeah, you will see me like this lately.

2011-02-19T05:20:00.000-08:00

It's 19 Feb today.
I survived another month.

exam on next week.
working on Fluid Mechanics papers.
Haha guess what?
fluid mechanics never stop giving me surprises.
for every question I encountered, I went 'woah, oh my god' non stop.
It's either freaking troublesome, or freaking tough.

I started all motivated, and then I was impatient cause I cant solve it, and then I went paranoid after I realised that's not the only question I didn't know how to solve, and now,

I am as calm as mill pond. I am like totally accepted the fact that I am simply not competent enough.

sighh.

2011-02-13T07:40:00.000-08:00

Happy Valentine to all couples!
tomorrow would be the role play session,and i am not good at acting :(.
lets hope it would be fine.

ps: spending valentine alone is way better than spending it with the wrong one.

2011-02-11T04:04:00.000-08:00

I need someone who is sincere to me.
sounds so pathetic ehhhh hahaha.
I wont die even if I don't, but of course it would be better if I have one.

2011-02-09T08:09:00.000-08:00

OMG I AM STILL FEELING THE EXCITEMENT OF FINISHING A YEAR LONG MODULE !

OH YES TODAY IS OFFICIALLY THE FINAL PDD PRESENTATION!

Thanks kelly for the slides design!
yong ren for doing sooooo much calculation on financial projection!
zhaojia for coming out with such great idea on the advertisement video!

chong siang who did the awesome SWOT ANALYSIS and name cards!

PK for being our CEO and launching our company page!

I think we did not bad:)

heh.

I love you guys <3>

2011-02-07T04:13:00.000-08:00

OHHH FINALLY GOT MY STARBUCKS DIARY.
HAHAHA i am so happy.

PDD PRESENTATION is on wednesday.
the PI test would be on wednesday too !
need to get back to study mood.

aza-aza fighting!
and happy chinese new year evyone :)

2011-02-06T06:48:00.000-08:00

What does ey ey means?
After so long thats what you said?
I am not even motivated to reply.
perhaps I got it by mistake.
and if you are saying hi again this time,
wouldn't it be a little too late?

There's so much more important stuffs to do,rather than spending time hating you.
ah, get back to reading pi notes.

2011-01-28T06:55:00.001-08:00

Where do I start？
been watching fringe lately. drowned in imagination. mix up reality with stories.
Something happened that made me don't wanna go out from my room.
don't wanna face anyone.
that was terrible.
It's hard to described.
All i can say is that I am shocked he just spill out all those words, eventhough not to me. My mind kept telling me he's trying to convey his message to me. THAT WAS SCARY.

sigh. lets set this aside.

it's friday nite:)
having good time with myself in the room, doing report, watch fringe, and ate hello panda. hahaha.

2011-01-21T23:26:00.000-08:00

I WANNA DRINK STARBUCKS COFFEE SO MUCH RIGHT NOW.:(

2011-01-21T05:14:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I really wonder why there's always this empty feeling deep down in my heart,and it grows stronger when I stop doing work.

I never really thought why, because I don't like to recall awful stories.
And it seems like I have no one to complain to, everyone has moved on.
and who the fuck cares?

and as time passes, who's fault that is and why it just stopped there, whatever reason it is, or it might be, doesnt seem to be important anymore.
It was too long ago that everything seems so unreal, and I just don't have the right to even start blaming you.

So i would just suck it up, get myself busy with work, continue to live my life, and I dont believe I am stupid enough that I cant get away from this emptyness.

2011-01-19T04:19:00.001-08:00

OMG I FINISHED THE HEAT TRASNFER FORMAL REPORT.
SUMMITED!!!

FINALLY! :)

2011-01-14T06:00:00.000-08:00

Severe stiff shoulder and muscle ache due to 3 hours sitting and typing.
This week had been chaotic.
I was angry, dissapointed, deppressed, sad.
Things got a little out of control.
And then I told myself that it's easier to do things on your own than to try to change someone completely.
Then I got a little more confident and calm.
I won't die. A report can't kill me!
and I won't cry either. OFCOURSE NOT. i'm turning 20, be a crybaby no more.

Let's note down something happy :)
Eating ice-cream on a rainy day is the coolest thing I have done this week :D.
and trying to cross the road without getting the rain droplets on the ice-cream succesfully is fun!! hahaha!

oh I think mr kong hate me now, I hadn't been paying much attention in his class.
MZ kept talking to me. But I feel a slight happiness when he asked: so adelline and mengzhe, yes? HAHAHA. i dont know why, I am just happy .alrite, i will listen to your lesson cher, next time.

WOOHOO! cursing people can be fun some time. I don't mean I want them dead. alrite, maybe for a moment I do.HAHAHA.

2011.

2010-12-31T11:47:00.000-08:00

Welcome year 2011!!!!
Went countdown at Berjaya Megamall.
People were all crazy.
They blast music, they dance, they sing, shout, and they poke balloons!!
lots and lots of them!
I could hear all the explosion just next to my ears. scary man.
But i guess i enjoyed the crowd .ha :)

SO NOW,
SOME NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS MAYBEEE?
1. to see good in everything bad.
2. no more crybaby pls.hello,you are turning 20 soon.
3.fight for what I want!! but accept failure with open heart :D
4. keep in touch with those that care about me and those that I care about.
5.help more people! I dont know how,yet, but i beleve when there's a will, there's a way.

let's make it 5 first !

ITS 2011 PEOPLE! HAPPY NEW YEAR!

2010-12-19T23:42:00.001-08:00

6301.) Every day, I think of you. Every day, you cross my mind. Every day, I see something that reminds me of you. Every day, I'm missing you. Every day, I wish you were mine. Every day, I wonder what could have been. Every day, I think of why you did this. But every day I'm also getting stronger. Every day I'm moving a little more on.

Something I got from tumblr and found it related.

2010-12-15T09:09:00.000-08:00

year 2010 is going to end soon.
BYE teenage life!
feel sooo old. old old old. like an old hag.
just before this year ends,
I want to meet those I care and those who care about me,
tell them how grateful I am, for their presence in my life,
say things that I forget or did not say( for whatever reason it is),
do things I have always procastinated,
not gonna drag it to next year.nope, I will bring none of this to 2011.

just a checklist for myself:
-meet boonwun when i got back to kuantan.
- visit siau chui in melaka.
- have a christmas party and gather all the people that I care,
-get dad and mum a thankyou card,
- yum char with my old gang.
-gossip and slpover with jessmine and sis.
-shopping and movie with joey and jovenn
-clean up my room
-go to the beach and just relax n do nothing
-talk to yang about his study.
-hang out at TGIF with housemates
- Get some presents for my cute little neice and nephew.

well, that's it for now.
looking at what I want to do makes me so energetic, so motivated.
My life is awesome, yet not complete.
I will explore the world more and find it to complete my life.
<3 wish me luck people ! :)

2010-12-13T08:16:00.000-08:00

dear diary,

it has been a bad night.
I am so getting used to being betrayed.
or at least i feel so.
I bitch you, yes my fault,
you can bitch me back,
not like you have always been nice to me,
but it doesn't mean you could just simply spill things out.
ouch. it hurts.

2010-11-24T15:54:00.000-08:00

dear diary,
I am not feeling too well, mentally.
I know I am abit stressed up, paranoid seeing the outcome didn't meet the effort.
I don't seem to know the way to fix it.
what I have done so far is just ignoring the troubles.
diary diary, hope the next time i spill things out here again, they are good things.

yours sincerely,
dreamer.

2010-11-23T06:07:00.001-08:00

I know i was suppose to be learning mathematics.
But i saw more symbols than numbers.
I know the teacher was speaking english
but I couldn't understand even when I tried very hard to.
it made my head spins.
ah!
terrible!
I guess that's what they call it-alien language.

adelline, Please don't screw up tomorrow's experiment :(.

2010-11-21T04:54:00.000-08:00

My heart almost stop beating.
look what have i done to my heart!
Please dont fall apart now, you still have to buck up and get going.

How to get an easy life

2010-11-12T05:47:00.000-08:00

all you have to do is stop making someone the centre of your life.
pick up a hobby,
or work hard to achieve something,
have faith in yourself,
always try your best,
believe tomorrow is always brighter and better.
Play hard, laugh hard
read books-alot alot of them.
learn to do things on your own,
and if terrible things happen, face it and change it,
and if you are unlucky that it doen't work,
just go with the flow.

If you practice all these, you will find that there are other more important things,
so much that you don't have enough time to finish them, and you will realise that he ain't everything.

Some pieces of me is missing, and I dream alot, but I am still alive.
Come to think of it, it leads me no where.just leave me so insecure and vulnerable that every single little changes affect my day.

You see, life becomes easy when you stop working hard for someone else and start living exactly like how you want your life to be.

ps: going to do some community service tomorrow.second activity after collecting old newspaper last last week. yay

2010-10-30T02:27:00.000-07:00

had brunch with mz at JP.
the stingray was as hard as meat.
mz said the stingray must had lived for more than 100 years.
hahaha.
was it me who can laughed at anything or was she the one who can make me laugh with anything she says.
bid goodbye to her, and went to fairprice to get ingredients for tonight's dinner.
I am having pasta for dinner,
with mushroom, fishcake and asparagus:D
an aunty stopped me on my way to bus interchange,
and i was wondering why until she said: ur zip,ur zip,and she pointed at my shorts.
that was embarrasing! Oh my gawd, i didn't zip my shorts! :(
alright, i said thankyou to her and quickly fix it.
well well, there are still some kind aunties out there hahaha.

eek gotta continue doing heat transfer report,
when am i going to finish it?

2010-10-29T04:39:00.000-07:00

November is coming soon!
hello world,
I am in love with sleeping these few days.
sleeping can be so wonderful, you don't have to think,
so whenever I am stressed, sad, insecure, my life is fucked up,
i go to bed.
that's the best cure.
hahas.
life's pretty good. i laughed alot.
do have some negative thoughts sometimes,
whenever it comes and hit me, i go to bed.
i find sleeping a good idea,
really a good idea.

2010-10-16T06:56:00.000-07:00

this feeling is complicated.
I am happy that I came back here, to the familiar atmosphere.
the familiar humid and hot weather.
but at the same time, I miss Aussie.
miss the people,
miss the cold weather,
mis glenelg,
port adelaide,
Handroff,
and I miss the new memories without the wrong person.

people is a complicated animal,isn't it?

2010-10-01T02:57:00.000-07:00

black swan imported from england, nice isn't it :) yeh that's the boat we paddled :p

today's weather in Aussie is lovely <3

around 20 degree c.

went to school.

then to casino.

first time to casino hey!

went to paddle in the lake too :p

ah it's just so so so nice!

2010-09-28T05:18:00.000-07:00

loving the life in aussie.
well, up till now.
people are more friendly and open-minded.
they great you when they see you.
weather is lovely too, abit cooling with sunshine.
wide sky, moving cloud.
first day of school tomorrow.
wish me luck people :)
hope it's a great day tomorrow yeh!

fairy tale in adelaide

2010-09-25T04:46:00.001-07:00

SO HERE I AM!

stepping on the land down under.

reached adelaide airport at around 6.30am-the time here.(1 & a half hour faster than singapore & m'sia)

can feel the chill when the wind hits my body.

we took a bus to the town area, it's a pretty peaceful town.

so from the city area, alighted from the bus, with our huge luggage, we begun exploring this small town.

we took pictures,
got all excited over some beautiful scenery,
met friendly australian who directed road to us,

ahs, small town with friendly people and beautiful scene-what else can I hope for?

maybe I should just leave every burden and problems behind.

it's a new world here.

Lets experience something different.

Looking forward to explore more tomorrow.

everything's new . yeh, everything's new.

2010-09-19T19:07:00.000-07:00

I sent that email.

what do I do with my life now?

2010-09-18T09:45:00.000-07:00

Thursday-
went to IKEA and had a chitchat with her and her and her.
joined the class for buffet hotpot at Marina Square.

Friday-
went to Meiji. been cheated to buy a huge pack of biscuit:(
went to kbox at Cineleisure after that.
met with lynn at school and joined the mid autumn festival organised by International Student Club. went to Mount Faber. the view was sooo stunning :) the air was cooling and the place-ah! simply amazing.
ps: At first I was thinking, eh the guy is having a nice accent there, then I realised he's from the UK. he has got nice accent .lol.
it was a tiring day. I got headache and i am dead on bed right after i took a bath.

Saturday-
went to bukit batok with lynn to have lunch.
yeh I know, what's there except a small west mall right?
We just wanted to try the things we used to do, the food we used to eat, and the playground we used to hang around :)
so we went there, bought soya milk and popiah, also glutinous rice for tomorrow's b'fast :D
met with dw and wj at JP.
had ramen as dinner and then we headed to clarke quay.
went to Timber and had few drinks.
wew,a nice bar with live band.
wj drove us home after taking lotsa crazy pictures.

have been trying to make myself so busy and exhausted so I have no time to think, no time to wonder, no time to feel.
yeah,seems like you are having a great life now that you don't even remember that I exist.
I think i am a little drunk hahahaha.

2010-09-12T00:37:00.000-07:00

constantly reminding myself that I have a great life-
My mum and dad love me,
I have a bunch of old friends who care about me,
I have a room to stay,
a caring roomie,
nice dresses,
enough dollars to spend,
I can make my own decisions,
I don't have any severe health problem,
I can breathe,
I can walk,
I am blessed.

There is nothing in the world that I should feel sad about,
I have a great life. ahh yes, I should feel blessed.
stop wanting everything else to be great adelline.

2010-09-11T18:58:00.000-07:00

-went to Mac at Pioneer Mall with mz.

-did a little reading too-

super huge dessert - ice cream with lotsa fruits and pudding:D
chilli crab pasta @swensen.
pizza delivery for dinner @ home

we were aruguing who should make the call

cause no one wanted to-

talking ova the phone is abit scary i suppose hahaha

so finally Thomas did.

and the first thing the person who picked up the call said:

hello, you nemmmmmm?

no one knew what he was saying!

and there he goes again, may I know your nemmmm ?

after a few times..

ah,he was saying name !

oh yeh, wondering what the first picture is ?

Taylor Lautner is just ma favaurite these days <3>

2010-09-06T22:57:00.000-07:00

hello diary,
feel like typing today.

I think about things, I cried, I told myself it's time to stop,
when I just made up my mind,
something hold on to me,
and I abandoned my thought.
It's a pitty struggling like this,
ah,
what do I do
I know nothing is right-but I dont want it to just end like this.
always thought maths is tough!
this is tougher!

lala. go ahead and say I am a worrier.
I am, because I experienced how ugly things can get.

2010-08-29T06:50:00.000-07:00

I was like a total idiot
asking for a unreasonably stupid question,

hate this feeling owh............

2010-08-18T04:23:00.000-07:00

home is too good,
too much temptation,
i am in a totally different world now- i am in heaven;D
being away from the small island makes life slow and tooo relaxing.
can't feel the pressure at all. hahs.
not sure whether it's a bad thing or a good one.

hey gotta study ok!
study.
not relax here.

ok,*slap-ma-self*
go study now!
au revoir!

2010-08-02T05:50:00.000-07:00

Went to subordinate court to translate my birth certificate from Malay to English.$18
Went to the bank to get the bank statement.$20
Went to library to print those forms.$2
still need to certify the documents.
visa fees.$100 +
OMG how much exactly do I have to spend just to get the visa done?

tired travelling here and there.
I am going to bed early today, if I can :)

2010-07-30T06:25:00.000-07:00

done the pdd presentation today!
the morhology matrix technique.. hahaha he was praising us for using that but I just ramdomly chose one :)))
ok so I am quite happy he gave a rather good comment on run music run.yeppie :)

went to sing at kboz with mz.
but my mood,it's not getting better.

2010-07-29T08:57:00.000-07:00

No phone for a couple of days-
I will bare it,
I gotta keep my promise,
Let's just hope it will only be couple of days,
and not" from today onwards".

2010-07-25T00:18:00.000-07:00

it's so painful that i think i am gonna die!
urghhhh
go away go away
stomachache

2010-07-24T08:13:00.001-07:00

you cant even take a joke like that.
FarK. I shouldn't give in,
should just end it that way.

2010-07-23T07:45:00.000-07:00

2010-07-21T04:58:00.000-07:00

thank you pikachu lynn for giving me a surprise!
she told me she hurt her leg and wanted me to help her to get back home.
I was half-awake when i received her call.
so I went down to look for her,
there was an uncle singing.( so creepy)
and then I was thinking maybe I misheard her, or maybe it's something else who called me.
HAHAHA
i think too much!
she was there,
holding my favourite balloon and a cake.
I was so touched that I almost cried.
I am so happy that she still remember the balloon i like.
thankyou so much, roomie.

To those who remembered my birthday
and texted me or send me greetings via facebook.
I am really grateful,
cause I know everyone must be busy with your lives,
thankyou for sparing your time to wish me :)

a very encouraging message from hui yee:
We are always thinking about you,
We will always say: When xue er come back?
I know you can always come back but we are already used to asking when you will be coming back.
hahas.you almost 20 dy XD
BUT you are always our buddy, who like to shout, laugh, although very noisy but I like cause you are " kai xin guo"
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Inever know i am so noisy hahaha.

something touching from siau chui:
Happy birthday mihun!(my nick she gave me, she is mee :D)
time flies~~phew~
remember last two years you celebrated your b'day at genting and last year celebrated at Singapore.
enjoy your b'day with mama( pikachulynn) yah!
Take a second and think of our story-mihun and mee, and SMILE <3 miss you~~
mihun and mee is a little secret we share when we were 16.
that time.. we were both naive :D like a little angel hahaha
I guess I can share the story eh sc?:p
we were talking about french kiss

sc:" ee.kissing with tougue is abit digusting "
dreamer:"i think not bad. like eating marshmallow I guess"
sc:" no, if the guy eat mihun then the gal eat mee. and then they kiss with tougue.then the mee mix with the mihun"
dreamer:"ok now it's really disgusting"

2010-07-21T04:46:00.000-07:00

20th July 2010-
the day dreamer turned 19!
alot of ' first time' that day
first time trying ice-skating.
first time having pasta mania as dinner with a balloon floating beside me.
first time blowing 19 candles on top of doughnuts and share it with a fren.. and a cat.hahas.
first time celebrating birthday with him.
I was happy yesterday.
I like everything yesterday.
like the dinner, like the present, like the balloon, like the video with an idiot singing.
I can watch the video every day and i wont get bored hahaha.

but cinderella can only be the princess for one day,
after the clock strikes 12,
she's just cinderella.
she's no one special.

aiyah! but i guess one day is enough :D

ps: I am afraid. really afraid that this is the last time for me being the princess.

2010-07-19T06:53:00.000-07:00

I HATE YOU.
SO MUCH.

2010-07-18T08:46:00.000-07:00

went to tampines to meet xerri.
thanks xerri for the matcha icecream!! I really love it !
had ayam penyet for dinner again.
yes and my stomach is sick again.
i just coudn't resist the belacan temptation!
the belacan was really niice :(

was wearing the new shoes. i love the shoes.
but it makes my feet painful.
Half of my right feet was out of da shoes and i was walking like a duck on my way home, ugly right?

xerri: this mall sells cheaper stuffs.
dreamer: oh isit? great. i like cheap stuffs! cheap cheap ! :D
xerri: yeah you cheap.

hahahahah. yeah i am cheap.

2010-07-16T08:52:00.001-07:00

found an old pic.
my eyes are without eye bags or dark eye rings!

now, it's so visible whenever i take off my glasses :(

2010-07-14T07:05:00.001-07:00

went to eat dim sum for dinner with my classmates.

attendees are :Mr Goh, tai jien, maki, jin hua, yong ren, eugene, qw, leslie and me.

look at the photo, we ordered alot!

ate until we could hardly move.

it costs around $120.

the food aint bad.

maybe i am just too hungry after a long walk from bugis to farrer park area.

ps: I will remember what you did Mr. Goh! urggh!

accused for something that i dont even know what's my fault. and that person still show me that' if you dont understand, forget it' face.

2010-07-13T05:53:00.000-07:00

this semester is choking me to death.
tons and tons of work just keep accumulating.
After finishing this, the next will pop up. it's endless.
it seems to take forever to clear every assignment or report.
if you dont start working, things are going to push you back, and back and back until you bump! fell off the cliff and die.
i would really wanna take a break from everything.
a vacation or something?
but now i can only work hard. and i mean HARD to try to complete as much work as possible.

fark school. you guys agree?

2010-07-12T22:59:00.000-07:00

watched world cup final at sentosa.
saw alot of spain and netherland fans :D they were so excited the whole night.
cheering and shouting non-stop.hahas.

4 hours sleep.
and a movie on Monday.
( so my friend said he changed his plan to Tuesday so we went to watch on Monday)
wee!
free popcorns. hehe.

back to school today..
and i am drowned by chemical reaction _ _

2010-07-11T03:30:00.000-07:00

TADAAAA!!!
SHORT HAIR :D

nah, it's a wig ;)
if people keep liking this picture in facebook, i might really consider to cut my hair short.
hahaha.

2010-07-09T05:17:00.000-07:00

if someone said they are going to treat you to movie,
and asked you when you are free,
you said you are free on friday and you actually tried to make sure you have nothing on that day.
then he said he can't make it on friday. so well, ok fine, i said on tuesday, he said he has something on.
so, i said on next monday, and i am quite happy since that day I dont have lesson.
and when you thought everything is settled, monday is set, so now he tells you to change to Tuesday.

Totally ruined my mood.
alright i am a little bias, maybe if others do this to me, its fine, just not, not you.
Nah, not going to watch anymore, no movie is just fine.

so i am free again on Monday, anyone wanna hang out with me ?

2010-07-09T04:13:00.000-07:00

i am going to cut my hair tomorrow.

i am really gonna cut.

:_(

2010-07-07T09:54:00.001-07:00

just came back from cineileisure.
eclipse was super duper nice, okay, i exaggerate abit.
not the movie that was super duper nice,
it was Jacob!
omg,he's so so so hot!
he's so great with the short hair and the biceps!
ahhh i almost fainted cause i was too happy. hahaha.
few parts that i like about this movie-

first,
jacob kissed bella. and bella punched his face and hurt her own hands.
and when edward and jacob almost fought each other, the dad came and asked: hey whats wrong?
jacob: I kissed bella and she broke her hand punching me.
it was like -LOL at his facial expression

second,
jacob: you will marry him?( he turned and wanted to leave)
bella: hey wait. stop.jacob.stop!
jacob: give me one good reason why I shouldn't leave
bella: coz I care about you
jacob: no not good enough
bella: hey coz you are important to me
jacob: still not good enough
bella:I want you to kiss me

and they kissed!

then edward was just few metres away.
bella: you saw it?
edward: no, but i can read his mind. you love him.
bella: but i love you more.

third,
bella was freezing in the camp. and jacob came in to warm her up and edward cant do anything but watch them.
jacob: maybe you should take off your clothes (i think he meant that way will warm her up faster, he wanted to make edward jealous i think)

i don't know why I like to see Jacob and Edward fighting for Bella.
that was just so so exciting.hahas.

yeah off to bed now. tomorrow's gonna be a long day. I dont wanna be a zombie again.
nites everyone!:)

2010-07-03T09:12:00.000-07:00

learning hard- your love is my drug by kesha.

2010-07-02T19:40:00.000-07:00

its raining now, so cooling^_^

let's forget about what had passed.
let's get things done and take control of life again.

things to be completed:
-maths tutorial
-chem reaction report assesment- due next wed
-fluid mechanics tutorial ( seriously need to pick upD: )
-fluid mechanics pre experiment-due mon
-read up bioanalytics
-d-plus !!
-plant design CA2
-plant simulation 2
-gems video- due wed
-maths pbl
-clean my room
-wash clothes

that's all i guess :)

2010-07-01T09:00:00.000-07:00

feeling like..
not needed and not wanted
often when you are down,
only then you will remember how great your life was,
how great were the friends and family around you,
and only then, you will miss them.
Homesick when I'am in second year of poly,eh?
i am dead inside,
been living like a zombie for 4 days since school starts,
its a torture to wake up and go to school,
i am so demotivated,
tell me why i shouldnt be?
i failed in my social circles
i dont have the power to control most things
didnt gain what i deserve after much effort,
and I feel so weak, feel so useless.
I desperately needed someone,
someone that I can share my problem with,
but I came to realise that no one can be there for me forever,
and even if they listen to you,
either they dont understand,
or they cant do anything.

I know i need to cheer myself up again.
kept telling myself: life's still great! but the heart says: prove it! :(

heart, please get well soon.

something I learnt,
there are people out there that I almost gone nuts cause of their attitude.
but next time if you dont like their words, simply walk away. Dont ever hope they will change to better.
consider how hard it is to change yourself, then you will see how hard it is to try to change others.

2010-06-28T08:30:00.000-07:00

dreamer is so sad right now.
do you have to put me through this everytime?
ahhhhhh
only if my heart wont feel the pain,
off to bed.

2010-06-26T05:54:00.000-07:00

one week flies in a blink of an eye.
i feel like i am one of the disabled cause my friends have been driving and fetch me here and there and i cant go out without them -.-
oh man, I wanna drive.
thankyou everyone that keeps me company during my stay in kuantan,
I really appreciate it, I really do.

-shopping with mum
-celebrated sin yee's bday at east grill steakhouse
-yumchar session at old town
-steamboat party
-watched toy story 3 and cried hahaha
-had fun at teecee
-ate durian and lambsteak

and sorry to my groupmates :((( coz i am in kuantan and didnt help much with those projects.

to that certain someone,
u asked me to bet?
i bet that you will juz leave me alone for these few days.
i won,
but i am not happy.

siau chui faster come :( i wanna talk to you.

2010-06-24T20:55:00.000-07:00

fuck everything!!!!!

2010-06-23T00:16:00.000-07:00

I am having bad stomach.
T^T
i really wanna enjoy the steamboat later, so please, let me be fine.

2010-06-20T09:06:00.000-07:00

we were 7 minutes late and the bus was already gone!
we chased after the bus by taxi to woodlands checkpoint,
i kept asking the driver to hurry.
we run, and walk, then walk and run.
we saw a transnational bus!!!
we thought we made it.
sadly, it's the bus to KL.
the bus driver told us the bus to kuantan had just left a minute ago!
the driver agreed to give us a ride to JB custom.
and we finally caught up with the bus back to kuantan!
never in my life i felt so relieve and excited to be able to get in a bus.hahaha.
so there we go, another exciting "amazing race" lol
fyi, it happened before, we chased train.

AHHHHHH HI HOMETOWN!
HOW HAVE YOU BEEN?
^_^ so happy to see the familiar faces, the usual noisy environment, met my new maid saiwan who knows little Malay ( I dont remember whether she's from, vietnam or myammar), the little black bird and ofcourse my lovely bed!
I am still on my queen-sized bed. ahh last nite i was rolling left and right, covering myself with the thick blanket and turn the air-cond to max. ahhh so nice to slp on my bed!!

yesterday's dinner was awesome.
first it's durian,
then we had lamb chop specially made by mum, so juicy so tasty just sooooo nice hahaha
we had mashed potatoes too, fries, lamb shank, blueberry chese tarts, fruit tarts, orange vodka and finally a cake.
we were playing and taking photos with the cake hahaha.
i guess a new video will be uploaded soon.

I am back to heaven hahahaha.

2010-06-19T08:38:00.000-07:00

went to toastmaster today:D
No people. toastmaster ain't a restaurant, nor a shop selling foodie.
its a non-profit organization that educates you how to speak.
They train you to become more confident in public speaking, how to use different tone, how to use body language etc.
all guests were asked to introduce themselves and talk about one interesting thing that happened to you last week.
I wasn't expecting that! hahaha.
i was the third one to speak, all I had on mind was just Matthew. hahaha
so i start with 'Hi everyone. my name is adelline.." there goes my stories about how i met this amazing guy.
I cant believe myself actually sharing how i admire this guy, with 30 ppl, males and females, that were attending the meeting. and i dont know them=)
johannes seemed to be surprised that I talked about Matthew.
5 points for me .yeppie. johannes only got 2:)))
I dont know how they grade it but i guess more points the better?

met with xerri ta at ion orchard.
i bought a pair of legging and long socks- for my aussie trip.

ps:
i think i enjoy meeting new people from different cultures and different backgrounds.
you can learn alot just by talking to them. be it good or bad, it's still beneficial.
eventhough i am nervous sometimes, eventhough i am still lack of experiences compared to them, but i guess i will be better after some time.
well just like what one of the toastmasters have said:
you dont have to be good to start, but you have to start to be good.

2010-06-17T09:08:00.000-07:00

I went to St james power house with a friend.
it was ladies night yesterday so I got 5 free drinks !
no this is not the point !
a friend that my friend met in Aussie came to Singapore for a conference.
Doing some business here i guess.
he's a filipino-chinese guy,23 yo.
I cant believe I met such a cool person.
I was amazed at the way he spoke and acted.
First, he always try to start a conversation.
He speaks well and he tries not to leave me out.
well you know, when they talk about their friends, i kinda dont get them.
he explained to me so I could understand.
He can just start talking to strangers in the club like they have known each other for a long time.
He can talk about anything and eveything.wow.

second, he was so gentleman at asking a favour.
my friend wanted me to get him a drink, but i wanted my friend to accompany me.
" come on, get the drink for us pls and i will give you a hug in return. Give us a minute to have guy to guy talk,unoe."
so when i was queuing, he came to check on me cause i wasnt back for quite long.
he acc me to queue for a while and then he said
" i tell you what, why not we just leave the queue, i will treat you something"
and he treated me whisky with cola .wee
three of us dance and drink.
at around 12am, he got me a cab and gave me a hug and he left.
that was his last night in Singapore.
i am definitely gonna miss him. Well, i think my friend will miss him even more.
my friend said:" what do i do. its his last night in singapore. i dont know what to do with him"
not easy to see my friend getting so sentimental.LOL.
i am so much like a kid when i talked to him. so inexperience and shy.
its endless to talk about his good things.
i hardly meet people doing international business, who has been to many places, speaks confidently like he does.
ahs my life circle is still revolving around school kids

:) i wanna meet more people like him in the future .
ps: he told me something about my friend. infact, another friend told me the exact same thing too. the irony of this. hahas. yes i know, but i cant help it ok.

" he is a good guy, a good friend yah. but he wont be a good boyfriend"

2010-06-16T01:36:00.000-07:00

if it's a game you wanted,
a game it will be.

2010-06-13T07:37:00.001-07:00

i realised whenever I am in pain,i just keep on sleeping .
maybe i thought after i wake up, tadaa! problem's solved.
or maybe i just dont want myself to think.

is anyone out there like me too?
'feeling sleepy again =___='
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

a friend of mine said i am kind, i think he meant I have high level of acceptance.
basically it's just quite hard to make me unhappy.
because i always think from the other parties perspective.

but i realised i need to learn to take firm stand in some occasions.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I dont like to voice out when I have already known what's going to happen.
I feel it's pointless, and it doesn't change anything, so why not just keep the damn mouth shut?

but i think..well, sometimes you feel better after you say it out .=) i did. and i dont care whats gonna happen

2010-06-12T10:33:00.000-07:00

hello diary,
it's me again.
I am not feeling too well, that's why i am posting again.
I feel like I dont belong to anywhere now,
this feeling sucks.
feeling like an extra.

2010-06-12T07:44:00.001-07:00

you know,
things just wouldn't change.
I always know, I fooled myself not to believe.
it's like a cycle.
it hurts,
but i am addicted to it.
I used to think it was my fault that things didnt work out.
and i thought i need to give you what we missed out during the two years time.
but hey,
i guess it's really not my fault.
The only thing I did wrong was to reply that sms.
When pain turns into frustration,
you wouldn't even shed a tears.
too much a time,
i fake a smile and took everything in.
now i know that wouldn't work,
the sad things just keep on accumulating
and boo!
it will burst one day.
yet, i can complain to no one
because i chose this.
I always wanted to celebrate my birthday with you,
since every July you weren't here.
but maybe I cant wait until that time.
ahahas.
I really wished I could..

Have fun in KL.

2010-06-11T19:52:00.001-07:00

readers! you might need to turn your head abit. I am not sure how to rotate the pic :(

THE MST WEEK IS OVER.yeppie

I went to watch 'Karate Kid' at cineileisure.

thought it's karate but it's all about kung fu.

Maybe they should consider to change the tittle to Kungfu kid instead.

bought a pair of nerdy specs:))) the one i am wearing in the photo hahah.

went to bugis after that, intended to buy a new pair of shoes,

but nothing caught my eyes.

just before we parted,

we realised we haven't tasted the chocolate.

I said we will just share it next time.

took mrt back to boonlay. met up with lynn and her classmates.

talked cock-

and then she accompanied me to have dinner.

ps:

I dont mind sitting there to eat, the truth is I wanna share the chocolate when my mood turns better.

SODA with jelly is super duper nice=)

2010-06-09T20:33:00.000-07:00

one more paper left :D !

I can do whatever I want after that:))))

2010-06-07T02:17:00.000-07:00

some people just need to die.

OH YES GO AHEAD SAY I AM WICKED, KARMA OR WHATEVER.
for a moment I really wanted to stand up and give a big slap on ur cheeks.

NEVER think it's okay just because I never say anything.
I said one time is enough, you did it again, and again.

fuck it.

now I think again, maybe it ain't that serious.
But if it EVER happens again, I will send you to hell, I promise.

next time,
no-give-face one i tell you.

2010-06-02T09:10:00.000-07:00

I've been blogging quite frequently.
I have to yell out my thoughts here :D
It's always better after I type everything out. aha

Today experiment was quite a sucess!
something went wrong during the experiment,
but it was just small case.
I was the leader-realised it's really great cause you have control the whole process. hahaha.
so the experiment goes at you wish.
not bad being as one heh :p

You just dissapeared. hmm 3rd days.
I don't know whether I will hear anything from you again,
no idea what's happening to you,
how's your life,
maybe you got back with her.
alrite :)
it's non of my business, really,
but I need some time to sort things out.

been thinking alot,
about life,
about school,
about us,
but yeah no conclusion came to me
I dont know what to do :)
ahs just lets nature takes it course,
god will know what to do with me.

but I do realised something,
I dont want someone who makes me feel insecure.

2010-06-01T07:19:00.000-07:00

somone like to tease you so what?
someone you were trying to help just did the opposite to you, and still think it's nothing, yeah so ?
you really want that someone to try listening to your complain, just listen, but she just failed as a listener.
someone you think you could trust, just happened to threathen you with the little secret you share,so what?
someone you think is important never seem to treat you as the important one.
She is publishing how much she misses him, and think she is the most pathetic girl that deserved everyone's love, so what?

ALL THAT DON'T MATTER. THEY DON'T.
I am sick of myself being so weak at times.
ahhhh..
just give me a rest
I still have test.

2010-05-30T09:25:00.000-07:00

what the fuck is wrong with people these days?
SOMEONE I dont even know was trying to hook up with me in facebook.
and he is like 32 years old uncle. ewww
' u wan be my gf ma..hehehe, you look pretty'
omg a 30 year old guy saying such things.
that's just gross.

i told him to find someone his age. then removed him as friend :D

I dont know why I added him in the first place.
next time should really screen out those that I dont know and clean my facebook friend list.

2010-05-30T08:46:00.000-07:00

-went to meet up with the 'fishy' to get back my mp3 and return his.

-ahs, the ironic feelings.hahaha it has been so long.

-The meeting lasted for less than 30 seconds. no conversation. We waved at each other, returned the mp3 and went separate ways :D

-cooked prawn salad with honeydew! quite nice .hehe

-went Mc Donald with uncle leo to do our survey questionaire. 10 questions and we spend around an hour doing it-wols.-_-

-The ulcer is killing me. It's so torturing that I wish I could just tear my lips off.

T_T

2010-05-29T02:35:00.000-07:00

I realised i am in luck these days.
Firstly, in my previous post, I said I wanted to hold many many balloons and take picture of myself.Guess what? I really did, my part time job was to distribute balloons for bei jing 101. I had my wish came trough and i got paid! :)

Secondly, I said to mz: ahs if she gave me another chance, I would have chosen aussie so I'll have higher chance, but it's too late now.
and right after d-plus lesson, I received a call from uncle leo,saying that Dr. Wong asked me if I wanna go aussie.
Well, it is not confirmed I can go.
What I want to point out here is that, isn't my mouth amazing?:D what I said actually did happened. Maybe I inherited a wizard's blood.ahahahah.

SO, the MST is coming soon, in two weeks time.
I dont really have the mood,well, no mood to study.
I have a good life, my parents love me, my cousins love me. My friends love me.
I can feel their love,
and I appreciate it.
but my life is lacking of something, that i wish i had. -no i won't name it here:D

2010-05-28T10:43:00.000-07:00

tired.
tired.
tired.
my life shouldn't be revolving around you.
I hate it when i couldn't control how I feel about things.
I hate it when i feel weak and need someone.
ahhhhhh
life's crazy.

2010-05-18T08:20:00.000-07:00

omggg
i want to take a photo like this one day!
so cool!
:)
i love balloons